Why you should start sending Voice Notes

I don’t exactly remember how it started - but I remember how it spread; through my circles, my coven and even with some of my design clients. The Voice Note is hella powerful - and surprisingly spiritual - and I want to tell you why:

My Mercury is in Libra - an air sign. Mercury is the Planet of Thoughts, Ideas, and Communication, and depending what sign we have here can shed a lot of insight into how we think and connect with others. With my Mercury in Libra, I can feel my brain constantly on overdrive, always trying to relate to the person I’m connecting with. When the other person is speaking, my mind is racing to come up with examples that allows me to relate to them. And it’s not that I have to “come up” with these relatable examples; they just sort of happen. And sometimes I blurt them out.

I went to school for journalism, and I remember a specific lesson in class where we were learning interview skills, and my instructor let me know I had to just cut off the Education Rep I was interviewing in order to get my questions answered. He explained to me that some figures (especially political figures) were so well-versed in dialogue and interviews, that they answered the questions they wanted to, and loved to hear themselves talk.

If you wanted your questions answered you had to work for it.

My charming little Libra (Sun Sign) Self was horrified at the idea of interrupting someone. So I didn’t. And I remember the swarm of journalists around me were throwing questions out over top of each other in city hall, some louder than others. I drowned in the see of reporters - some professional and some students. I didn’t get “my questions” answered, and I had a hell of a time writing the article I needed to.

I was pissed at the C I got on my assignment.

So I started interrupting. Oof. I started asking the questions I needed to in order to get the information I was after. And I like to think I got pretty good as structuring a question in a way that got the answer I was looking for for my quote (totally manipulative and a real journalist approach TBH). I was nineteen and in college though, and these were the things that mattered in order to succeed in writing at the time.

But that mental approach really did begin to trickle into other areas of my life. I became the interrupter - especially when I felt a person was droning on and on and losing their train of thought or structure to their story. And even though I had learned how to harness my mile a minute mind and incessant questions… it was a little rude. OK it was a lot rude.

I don’t totally have this under control - I’m a work in progress! - and I think that it will forever be a work in progress since it’s a thing that was ingrained to me and I’m still primarily a writer by trade. And, well, my mind just can not be quiet - but I think the Art of Listening is incredibly more difficult to master than the Art of Asking Questions.

Insert the Power of the Voice Note.

A quick rundown of the Voice Note

The Voice Note is something you do on your phone - maybe it’s an iPhone thing; you hold down the record button while in a text conversation (iMessage), and speak your thought while holding the button down. Once you release the button, the recording stops. You then click send, and it darts off like a text message that the recipient then has to play and “keep” if they wish. The voice note will self destruct a couple minutes after it’s been played on the receiving end (not really - but it does disappear!). Sort of like instagram stories - but instead of 24 hours the Voice Note is gone in two minutes. And if you recorded a long voice note and try to play it back to yourself, it will erase itself after a couple minutes of listening (that 2 minute mark) - so you just have to commit and click send out of fear of losing everything you said. Perfectionists? You’ve been warned! And if you turn your phone horizontally instead of vertically (ACCIDENTALLY), your VN will also delete. I’m telling you the death of the VN is hard. But that’s all part of why it’s amazing.

I don’t think I’m alone in the “interrupting bad habit”. I think many of the conversations we have with others become these even better conversations because we each expand on the other while talking and connecting. But there is something powerful about letting a person finish an entire thought - AN ENTIRE THOUGHT - before the person on the receiving end even responds. It’s powerful and effective to hear yourself talk and to let yourself get your full expression out before it’s interrupted. Even if that interruption is in good taste and helps expand your idea.

Voice notes allow you to record your entire thought or idea; to get it all out in its purity. It’s empowering. It’s also respectful - especially when you’re on the receiving end. Because you get to listen to the full voice note, and then record your own reply, further flowing with that feel good energy of listening, conversing and respecting one another.

When we talk for ourselves, fully, we often come up with the solution to the problem, or begin to comfort ourselves in the process. Say you send your GF a voice note about a shitty thing that happened at work: by venting everything out at once, we often come to a place of clarity, and the unhealthy and unhappy feelings associated with the experience have a chance to dissolve naturally, rather than lingering all day long.

Or if you feel crappy about something, by the end of the voice note, you may be surprised to find you’re being gentler on yourself and offering up explanations as to how you can feel better. No one else is comforting you yet - you’re standing in your power (or recording in it) and doing it yourself.

Have you seen Grace & Frankie? Frankie always takes recordings of herself talking about something, and she recommends Grace tries it too. Grace scoffs, but when she does try, she’s blown away but what she actually says - and you witness her bypass the ego and move right into Spirit. Hey Spirit!


When a person talks uninterrupted, their spirit starts to wiggle out, bypassing the ego because the ego can’t keep up with the stream of energy being expressed. When we’re interrupted, it gives our ego a chance to play catch up and kick back in. Doubt can creep it. Fear. The key is talking enough so that your spirit can wiggle out - even if it’s a five minute voice note to your best friend. You’ll surprise yourself with how authentic you are. And if you try to perfect it and listen back to your recording - there is a good chance it will delete - so you’ve got to trust yourself and what you said and THAT’S where the magic is.


And sometimes it’s literally just quicker to send a voice note than type out a long text! Those on the receiving end can listen to your VN while continuing what they’re doing - like the dishes or driving or whatever - rather than pausing to read.